Sunday, December 28, 2008

Damn Wankers

Home game was last night and it was a record turnout: 19 players.  Wait, let me clarify.  There were 18 players and a Brit. 

Not your average Brit.  Nope.  This one was a young hawtie that was bought in by his American friend (another young hawtie) that likes to play poker.  The Young American (YA) is the son of a neighbor.  He has played in and won the local Legion's charity game in the past.  My game was just a stop over for them on the way to a bar, any bar would do, or so they said.

YA was a little miffed with the Brit took his first buy-in.  It didn't take long for us to figure out that the Brit was playing just about any two cards.  Problem was he was hitting big time with them. 

I played my usual nitty game.  I gave up limping in with suited connectors when I kept getting raised off pre-flop.  After I had spewed about 20% of my chips I just had to wait patiently for a hand.

In the mean time the Brit was tearing up our table.  TOH was cleaning out the other table for a while before he spewed some chips to a player that had just rebought.  It wasn't long after then end of the rebuy before TOH was out.

The short stacks started falling out fast after the rebuy period ended even though we extended it one level since we weren't even getting in an entire circuit in per level.  The Brit was calling all-ins with any two cards and hitting.  The worst part was when he would pick up a real hand.  No one was expecting him to actually HAVE A HAND!

The Brit took out the YA, again.  Mutterings of "Wanker" were repeatedly heard from then on.  YA was kind enough to deal for us but we were all starting to wonder how rigged this was when the Brit kept getting hands that hit hard.  The Brit once flopped a boat and got the other guy to ship in after a modest bet from the Brit.  Another time the Brit limped in and flopped the nut straight and got 2 other people to ship it in drawing nearly dead.  That's right he took out two players in one hand with 9To.

I managed a nice triple up with AQdd.  The short stack under the gun shipped it and I wasn't going to fold this hand since I was almost equally as short.  The Brit wasn't going anywhere either.  My AQ managed to outflop the short stack's Kx and the Brit's Jx.  Woooooooot!

Not long after my triple up I picked up AA.  I went ahead and raised 3X because I thought I had a better chance of getting called; I was pretty sure a shove wouldn't get me anything but the blinds.  I do get a call from the BB.  The flop comes out T high.  BB checks to me and I debate about shipping but just put out a reasonable bet.  The BB hems and haws and then ships it on me.  I insta-call, ldo.  He turns over a week T and I almost break him.  The BB was left with 400 chips (blinds at 400/800) and he managed a couple double ups to get back in the game but did eventually go out before the money.

I spewed almost all of my stack when I limp/called the Brit's raise with 77.  The flop came A baby baby and was checked around.  I bet the turn and the Brit called.  I checked the river and he bet enough to almost bust me but I just couldn't see how he could be good here.  Well, that's because I would have never put him on KK (the second time he had KK at this table).  D'oh. 

The BB hit me and took about half my chips.  I had 9To.  The Brit had limped in like he did most every other hand.  The flop came AJ9.  SB checked I shipped and the Brit called like he did almost every all-in that he was in on.  The SB also called.  At this point I pretty much new I needed another 9 or T to win this hand.  The turn came out and didn't help me.  The Brit goes all in and the SB tanks.  She eventually calls with nothing but a flush draw.  The Brit shows J6 for a turned two pair.  The river was a T but still not enough to save me.  I busted on the bubble because the SB had more chips than I did.  Damn Wanker!

Sigh.  I hate bubbling my own game.

In one hand we went from 5 players to 3: The Brit with a ginourmous stack, Jack and Scoot who were both short stacked in comparison.

I didn't witness Scoot's demise but I'm sure it wasn't pretty.

Jack doubled through The Brit just before the last hand - I think he turned a flush.  The final hand was epic.  The Brit flopped a flush while Jack hit a set.  All the chips went in on the turn and the river boated Jack!  The Brit was left with 1 1k chip and conceded defeat.  BTW, TOH doubled up Jack right after he had rebought earlier in the night!

This was truly an epic night for the Zooks home game.

I expect the next one to be just as epic:  Khanwoman is coming for a visit over Martin Luther King weekend.  Nuff said.  And, yes, all y'all are invited!

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