Tuesday, February 17, 2009


I don't really look forward to playing the PokerSlut Tour's $1 rebuy event. 

There, I said it.

I'm just not much of a rebuy kind of person.  I know you have to take risk in the rebuy period.  I've read all the strategies for rebuys.  I know what I'm supposed to do. 

What those books fail to realize: the PokerSlut Tour doesn't play like your "usual" poker tournament.  Ever.

I thought I hit a few of the highlights of this tournament for you.

Let's just say I wasn't thrilled to find predator on my left.  Especially since he started with this:

predator06: all my bitches
gadzooks64: oh crap
predator06: im up like 1500 today..gonna spend it all here

Alrighty then.  Let's get this show on the road.  I limp folded the first hand after pred shoved, ldo.  Aight, I see how it's gonna be. Let's gambol!

This is where you click through to see the hands in all their gory, er, glory.

predator06: fk the autorebuy button ...i need the auto all in button
gadzooks64: suhwheat
predator06 raises to 105, and is all in
predator06: oh
predator06: this is scary

My next all-in:


Well, that didn't work out so well.

What can I say?  The nit in me took over.

Damn you Lillian!  Rebuy!

gadzooks64 adds 2,000, again

gadzooks64 adds 2,000, again

predator06: the more you rebuy the less % of rake you pay
Lillian2611: lol
Mrs Slys Money: poor zooks

gadzooks64 adds 2,000, again

predator06: rigged
gadzooks64: for your pleasure

Now for the best one of them all.

ostornadoe (Observer): grossssssssssss
gadzooks64: wooooot
Lillian2611: very
predator06: sry darlin
Blazman (Observer): terrible
gadzooks64: I yelled spade me
Mrs Slys Money: sorry i cant help but laugh

As soon as the cards popped up I said, "Spade me!" in the Skype chat!
That's Lil's 2nd AA!  Bitch.

Rabid Llama: sly.... pm me your address... i have something for you
Mrs Slys Money: heck yeah rl
Mrs Slys Money: it's not cause of that one hand is it?
Rabid Llama: you will like it..
Mrs Slys Money: geez, do gerbils ship well?
Rabid Llama: when on dry ice they do... just stick them in the oven on low for 30 mins

And I suck out again!

Nice chop.  I'm such a retard.

rascony: lol, ~70k in chips on this table

Our table is definitely getting into the groove.  We have by far and away the most chips of the three tables in this thing.

Ok, I'm a nit.  I know that.  Hell, everybody knows that.  What most people don't realize is that rascony may very well be a bigger nit than me.  I struggled with this call but eventually decided "what the heck"!

Seat 1: Rabid Llama (2,000)
Seat 3: rascony (2,000)
Seat 4: Supercon (9,720)
Seat 5: Mrs Slys Money (2,000)
Seat 6: gadzooks64 (53,430)
Seat 7: predator06 (4,050)
Seat 9: Lillian2611 (23,800)

Wow.  I'm liking this more and more.

predator06: this is gonna go till 5am
Mrs Slys Money: this is just embarassing


Seat 1: Rabid Llama (2,000)
Seat 3: rascony (2,000)
Seat 4: Supercon (13,630)
Seat 5: Mrs Slys Money (2,000)
Seat 6: gadzooks64 (93,430)
Seat 7: predator06 (1,940)
Seat 9: Lillian2611 (2,000)

Ok, this is getting embarrassing.

Now, most people would punish the short stacks right about now.  But I have embraced my nittitude.  There's about 20 minutes left until the end of the rebuy and DAMNIT I'M NOT GOING TO LOSE ALL THESE CHIPS THAT I SUCKED OUT SO HARD TO GET.

Silly me, I thought I'd have two live cards.  I'm sure pred was thinking the same thing.  D'oh.

jlzinck (Observer): HOW can you run a tournament that degrades women??


Poor pred.... oh nevermind I loved it!

Mrs Slys Money: soooooo zookers
Mrs Slys Money: pretty substantial chip lead ya got there
Mrs Slys Money folds
Lillian2611: lol
predator06: last longer zooks?
Mrs Slys Money: better even it out so you don't get to embarassed if you lose
Mrs Slys Money: i mean cmon
gadzooks64: hahahah you better last longer than me
rascony: people at this table will have to take 1-2 to break even
predator06: last longer zooks?
gadzooks64: sure

Mrs Slys Money: yikes blinds are getting kinda high
Mrs Slys Money: i better push
Mrs Slys Money: im starting to think there is something wrong with my technique

Rabid Llama: sly dont forget to send your address to me..

predator06: oh wait...this tourney will be going for 5 more hours anyways

Mrs Slys Money: couldn't pass up the potential screen shot
Mrs Slys Money: oh nice
Mrs Slys Money: and then i get these
Mrs Slys Money raises to 2,000, and is all in
Uncalled bet of 1,920 returned to Mrs Slys Money
Mrs Slys Money shows [Ac Ad] a pair of Aces

I know Lil doesn't think this makes up for the other hand but even so...

Oh crap,  I hate it when pred has chips.

Rabid Llama: fikin rigged
predator06: so bad
Lillian2611: nutty
Rabid Llama: im out
Rabid Llama: going to work
predator06: ima get yo azz zooks

Mrs Slys Money: 85k more and im golden

Mrs Slys Money: well now im just getting pissed off
Lillian2611: Yeah, 'cause playing AA is way too loose. lol

predator06: zooks...if we get h/u im gonna time out every hand and stall
predator06: with ransom to play ...naked pics
predator06: its gonna be like 3am
gadzooks64: oh I got a ton of nekkid pics
Mrs Slys Money: dont be giving out my nekkid pics zooks

predator06: M=750 zooks..not bad
Mrs Slys Money: lmao pred

Man, I hated to fold here but pred doesn't mess around with that many chips.

Lillian2611: zooks had a spade, I bet
gadzooks64: Excellent fold
predator06: with yo spade
gadzooks64: KJh

Mrs Slys Money: hell only 1 minute!
Mrs Slys Money: $#!@

Rebuys are almost over.  Hmm, do I addon?  Well, duh!

Uncalled bet of 97,030 returned to gadzooks64

LOL, 97k in chips at the end of the rebuy!  Woooooooooooot!

Mrs Slys Money: so zooks
Mrs Slys Money: any pressure yet?
Squib (Observer): What I wanna know is "did Zoox rebuy"?

Ok, now it's game on.  I hate having pred on my left.  He's gonna play with me every chance he gets.  Like, oh, now.

gadzooks64: lol one too many zeros (meant to bet 500 on river, d'oh)

predator06: i call in pos zooks with any 2 on a pot raise

Mrs Slys Money: !##& i gotta finish at least 2nd to break even

nzgreen: doggy style?
predator06: all day
gadzooks64: promises promises

And I just love doubling up the short stacks.  Sigh.

Mrs Slys Money (Observer): so zooks
Mrs Slys Money (Observer): any pressure yet?
Mrs Slys Money (Observer): your m is down to 12,000

predator06: this may take all night
predator06: GOTTA be a turbo next time
Mrs Slys Money (Observer): this isn't a turbo?
Mrs Slys Money (Observer): good god
Mrs Slys Money (Observer): yeah its' gonna take forever for zooks to give away all those chips
gadzooks64: damn straight
gadzooks64: I be drinkin

...and waiting for the final table, shut up! it's a plan, my plan!

Mrs Slys Money (Observer): i think we had the fun table earlier, pred

Ooooooh, Snuffy, I hope you felt really dirty after this.

What a let down...

What a bunch of pussies:

Still a bunch of pussies.

I think I could get used to having a big stack...

Dayum, I get no action.

If he had fewer chips I would have probably put him all in.

NZ loves to punish my big blind but I'm willing to put him all in with this hand.

Pointledge is another one you can't let walk all over you.  I was willing to race him for all his chips.

I'm playing position and stack here.  No way I'm folding to his shove not with these stack sizes.

We're still a couple people short of the final table now. 

Final Table time!

Mrs Slys Money (Observer): rut roh
Mrs Slys Money (Observer): no pressure zooks
nzgreen: did zooks sell her account to zerb?

We lose rascony.

gg rascony

And I suckout so gooooooooooood.

gg pointledge

cgcpointledge (Observer): zooks is the biggest slut
gadzooks64: why thank you

Courtesy double up.  You're welcome, Snuffy.

From the moment I had amassed my ginormous stack, my friends begin the talk of what a fugly bubble bitch I was going to be.  I love my friends dearly but they can be total dickwads.  We were still 2 off the bubble when this hand happened.

Mrs Slys Money (Observer): wow

I heart predator for bursting the bubble for me with such style.  Unfortunately my stack wasn't sooooo huge in comparison anymore.  I sure as heck couldn't afford to make any mistakes now.

Snuffy's turn to give a courtesy double up.  He should have been penalized for doing it to NZ though.

Blazman: nz does not lose flips

Are you still reading this drivel?  Good gawds, people, get a life already.

Picking on Snuffy.

NZ gets jiggy with it and sucks out. 

gadzooks64: do you ever run like shit?
gadzooks64: eff you nz

Not happy with my reversal of fortunes, especially after he sticks his chips in with nothing but a fricking draw.

Blaz and Snuffy get in a pissing match.  Snuffy gets Pangered.

Lillian2611 (Observer): yay, panger!

Seat 1: predator06 (77,990)
Seat 3: nzgreen (105,015)
Seat 7: gadzooks64 (54,058)
Seat 8: Blazman (76,437)

I'm not happy with the way things are shaping up at all.

Lillian2611 (Observer): Hang in there - you can totally take this
Lillian2611 (Observer): pred, dump some chips her way why don'tcha?

This looks like a good time for some spewage.

Let's try to get some of those chips back shall we?

nzgreen: damn, I wish i was on skype when I rivered that flush
gadzooks64: uh huh
nzgreen: did u record it blaz?
predator06: we all talked shit about u
gadzooks64: eff you nz
nzgreen: u'd like that wouldnt u zooks

Damn, no action.

Is it time for my courtesy double up?

Another one bites the dust.

Blazman (Observer): and eff you
nzgreen: not u as well

Seat 1: predator06 (91,835)
Seat 3: nzgreen (167,574)
Seat 7: gadzooks64 (54,091)

This is not looking good.

Time for pred to spew a few.

Ok, maybe now?

Love the way I had to bet it piece meal but I at least got my double up.

Seat 1: predator06 (52,585)
Seat 3: nzgreen (132,433)
Seat 7: gadzooks64 (128,482)

Ok, that's more like it.

NZ timed out and folded.  Not sure what happened there.

Finally a hand that I can play back at NZ with and pred has to shove it in.  Sigh.

Lillian2611 (Observer): You two are crazy. :)
predator06: so youre saying ms pron is the sane one at the table?
Lillian2611 (Observer): Yes. :D

On Skype pred and I are discussing ways to play back at NZ.  I have more experience with him but until now I haven't been successful.  Pred was shocked when I shipped it here but I explained to him that I was so far ahead of NZ's range that I knew he couldn't call my bet and had I just c-bet here he would have floated me big time.

Time for pred to double up.

Mrs Slys Money (Observer): eyes on the prize zooks
Mrs Slys Money (Observer): and i aint talkin about pred's codpiece
gadzooks64: lol pred has a codpiece? I bet it smells fishy
Mrs Slys Money (Observer): well jebus, if that WASN'T a codpiece.....

Seat 1: predator06 (100,319)
Seat 3: nzgreen (60,543)
Seat 7: gadzooks64 (152,638)

Pred swears he folded A2.  He he he.

Seat 1: predator06 (57,119)
Seat 3: nzgreen (68,443)
Seat 7: gadzooks64 (187,938)

Mrs Slys Money (Observer): i don't know about anyone else, but i am extremely turned on right now

Man I hate doubling NZ up.  Hate. It.

I really really hate it when pred doubles him up!  Damnit!

Shit.  Shit.  Shit.

Seat 1: predator06 (73,080)
Seat 3: nzgreen (131,696)
Seat 7: gadzooks64 (108,724)


Seat 1: predator06 (86,091)
Seat 3: nzgreen (113,685)
Seat 7: gadzooks64 (113,724)

I have him covered by 39 chips?


Thank gawds his flush didn't hit or I might have lost my mind.

Mrs Slys Money (Observer): i came

Me, too, Sly.  Me, too.

Predator and I started negotiating a chop.  This had been going on for far too long and we were both ready to call it quits.  I'm not sure how he talked me into sending him money (if I won) but since I'd been drinking - well, anything was possible.

The chop was finalized:

Ship it!


And that is how you not bubble when you have a HUGE stack. 


BamBam said...



I made it all the way through this, and there was NO porn at the end?

I mean WTF?????

There was so much of it, I'm all like, "this has to be a test! There must be a HUGE reward at the end!

Weeeeeeeeeeeee.......... OH crap! All this, for stupid pokery crap?


Gadzooks64 said...

D'oh. Sorry about that.

What a let down that must have been ;)

Sorry to leave you, erm, hanging.

am said...

gawd, you don't even want her to start posting her frame by frame bowling scores.

Gadzooks64 said...

Oooooooooh, now THERE's a thought!